First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes… a baby, right?

Wrong.

See, I didn’t even think I’d ever have to address these comments seen as I will be getting married at 22 years old which is certainly not the right time for me to be thinking about children.

I know that there are parents out there that have children younger, and I’m not judging them, you’re doing amazing! But, it is certainly not what I’m currently seeing in my 5 year plan.

However, I am getting married next year. And, because of that, apparently people think that it’s ok to ask when I’m thinking of children?

To be completely honest, in today’s so-called ‘progressive’ society, I just didn’t expect this. People have babies in all kinds of situations, and I didn’t think it was anyone’s place really to say anything about it.

But, apparently it’s completely ok to ask two 22 year olds when they’re planning kids just because they’re getting married, which seems a bit of a weird notion.

Don’t get me wrong, one way or another, I would like children one day. I’ve always dreamed of being a mother and do see that in my future. However, I definitely do not see that in my near future for a whole host of reasons.

I want to travel the world first. In fact, this is mine and Zack’s plan once we’ve gotten married. 2020 is probably the only time we will ever be able to afford such a trip, so that’s our main marriage plan.

I also want to have a home first. Zack and I are going to be unsettled in-between places for the foreseeable few years, and I want to have this completely settled before children are on the agenda.

I also want to have a career established. As of right now, I have no idea what I’d actually like to do with my life, and feel like I’d like to have that sorted before I think about babies. Again, just a personal decision.

And my final, and most important reason is that I am not ready for children. And, neither is Zack. And, really, we are the only two people who’s opinions matter in this specific situation.

So, can we leave that nursery rhyme in the old fashioned nursery books please?

Marriage no longer equals babies, and babies no longer equal marriage! Both are a completely separate entity which should be a choice for everyone, not a presumed eventuality.

We’ve got a long time before this blog becomes a parenting one (if it ever even does), put it that way!

Love,

H x