I’ll be honest, I’m not feeling very festive this year. And, that may surprise you.

Given my christmassy blog and instagram content, I see how you may be fooled. But, that content was taken in November when Zack was home when I was feeling festive. 

And, now that he’s gone, so has all of my festivity.

I’ve said this in a vlog or two, but Zack is an actual Christmas elf. Like, I’ve always loved Christmas, but ever since I’ve been with Zack, each and every Christmas has been better and better. 

He brings all of the joy to the holidays for me, and I feel like I’ve kind of had a mini Christmas already with him going to Christmas markets etc. We haven’t exchanged presents or done the dinner, but we’ve got plans to do those things in January when he’s home. And, I’m excited for that.

But, until then, without him, it really doesn’t feel like Christmas at all.

And, I know that you may think that I’m acting like a LDR zombie, and I’m really trying hard not to.

But, it doesn’t feel like Christmas without Zack.

To me, Christmas has always been about having all of your loved ones around you. I won’t have the person that I love the most in the world there this year, and that’s really rubbish.

And then personal circumstances mean that I’m also not going to get the big family celebrations that we usually do, which is equally as rubbish. 

And, I haven’t really got the money or time for Christmas this year either. I know that this sounds sad, but money is really really really tight for me right now, despite how much work I’ve been trying to do. And third year stress is REAL. Way too real for me to feel any kind of festive.

So, honestly, I’m kinda gonna give this one a miss. I’m sure that I’ll still watch Christmas films, and bake and have a Christmas dinner, but I’m not going to go all out like I usually do. I’m going to reign it back and buy only my very close family a few gifts.

And then, in January, Zack and I are going to do our Christmas.

I hope that this post hasn’t been too much of a downer. I just wanted to explain a little why I’m not partaking in blogmas or doing any of the festive things that I usually do!

I’ve decided that this festive funk is okay. It doesn’t mean that I’m never gonna celebrate Christmas like I once did again, it just means that this year circumstances mean that I don’t feel too festive. And, I’m sure, at some point in our lives, we will all have a Christmas where we feel like that. Just know that it’s normal, and it’s okay.


H x